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Connect. Discover. Respond.

By Joseph A. Michelli

Published: May 31, 2008

Let’s face it, human beings are creatures of habit. Those habits allow consumer researchers to determine what colors get our attention, how to set-up store displays, and why customer loyalty cards are so popular.

I began to appreciate my extremely habitual nature while having lunch at a restaurant near my office. I was sitting in my regular chair and ordering my typical salad when I felt unsettled because my regular server wasn’t working. It's not like I had a relationship with that server; in fact I didn’t know her name and she didn’t know mine.

She never engaged me in any conversation beyond taking my order.

My discomfort yielded fairly quickly when my new server actually asked me my name while offering me hers. Heather then made small talk, not awkwardly but out of a seemingly genuine interest in establishing rapport.

No longer was I just another hungry, nameless patron.

By taking a genuine interest, Heather took the first step in a customer service process that I wrote about in my book: The Starbucks Experience: 5 Principles for Turning Ordinary Into Extraordinary.

She basically did the following with me:

She connected.
She discovered.
And later...She responded.

Heather reached out to me in a personal and authentic way. She realized that I could get food at and any number of restaurants but that she could offer a unique experience for me. It was all so simple but starkly different than what I was used to at that restaurant.

Beyond making that initial connection, Heather took the time to discover my needs. She asked questions and observed my behavior to garner data about my unstated preferences.

So what does all of this have to do with the church community?

A number of years ago, when searching for a church home, our family visited a surprisingly large number of congregations who treated us much like my regular server at that restaurant typically treated me. We were often ignored as congregants socialized with and greeted one another.

Fortunately, we found a church home that was rich with Heathers. It is a blessing when we take the time to break from our holy huddles and instead connect, discover, and respond to those newcomers who are divinely called to our church doorstep on any given day.

H.H. Williams once noted that “Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.”

May you and your church community seek to understand ways to master the art of connection so that each person can discover and have their spiritual needs met.

Joseph A. Michelli is an internationally sought-after speaker and business consultant. His is the author of The Starbucks Experience: 5 Principles for Turning Ordinary into Extraordinary, which has achieved bestseller status on BusinessWeek, and USA Today listings. His latest book, The New Gold Standard: 5 Leadership Principles for Creating a Legendary Customer Experience Courtesy of The Ritz-Carlton Hotel Company will be available in July, 2008. For more information about Michelli, log onto his website at http://www.themichelliexperience.com.

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